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Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Site URL: www.quotationspage.com/qotd.html
Feed URL: feeds.feedburner.com/quotationspage/qotd
Posts: 40
Followers: 3
Ellen DeGeneres
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Ellen_DeGeneres
Published: January 7, 2026 00:00
"The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens. We can't be the best that creation has to offer. I pray we're not all there is. If so, we're in big trouble."
Bill Cosby
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Bill_Cosby
Published: January 7, 2026 00:00
"Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home."
Willem de Kooning
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Willem_de_Kooning
Published: January 7, 2026 00:00
"The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time."
Joss Whedon, Zack Whedon, Maurissa Tancharoen, and Jed Whedon
Published: January 7, 2026 00:00
"It's not enough to bash in heads. You've got to bash in minds."
Henry Kissinger
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Henry_Kissinger
Published: January 6, 2026 00:00
"University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small."
National Lampoon
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/National_Lampoon
Published: January 6, 2026 00:00
"Let not the sands of time get in your lunch."
Dennis Miller
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Dennis_Miller
Published: January 6, 2026 00:00
"We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head."
Fred Allen
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Fred_Allen
Published: January 6, 2026 00:00
"You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a firefly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart."
Voltaire
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Voltaire
Published: January 5, 2026 00:00
"The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease."
David Friedman
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/David_Friedman
Published: January 5, 2026 00:00
"The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations."
Joseph Addison
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Joseph_Addison
Published: January 5, 2026 00:00
"An ostentatious man will rather relate a blunder or an absurdity he has committed, than be debarred from talking of his own dear person."
Errol Flynn
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Errol_Flynn
Published: January 5, 2026 00:00
"My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income."
Will Rogers
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Will_Rogers
Published: January 4, 2026 00:00
"The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has."
Aneurin Bevan
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Aneurin_Bevan
Published: January 4, 2026 00:00
"We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road. They get run over."
David Peterson
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/David_Peterson
Published: January 4, 2026 00:00
"If you don't know what to do, call the media and at least give the appearance of doing something."
Esther Dyson
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Esther_Dyson
Published: January 4, 2026 00:00
"The Internet is like alcohol in some sense. It accentuates what you would do anyway. If you want to be a loner, you can be more alone. If you want to connect, it makes it easier to connect."
Hector Berlioz
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Hector_Berlioz
Published: January 3, 2026 00:00
"Every composer knows the anguish and despair occasioned by forgetting ideas which one had no time to write down."
Edward Bulwer-Lytton
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Edward_Bulwer-Lytton
Published: January 3, 2026 00:00
"A life of pleasure makes even the strongest mind frivolous at last."
An English Professor
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/An_English_Professor
Published: January 3, 2026 00:00
"I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top."
Stanislaw J. Lec
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Stanislaw_J._Lec
Published: January 3, 2026 00:00
"I am against using death as a punishment. I am also against using it as a reward."
Carl Sandburg
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Carl_Sandburg
Published: January 2, 2026 00:00
"I won't take my religion from any man who never works except with his mouth."
Peter Ustinov
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Peter_Ustinov
Published: January 2, 2026 00:00
"Critics search for ages for the wrong word, which, to give them credit, they eventually find."
Alan Corenk
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Alan_Corenk
Published: January 2, 2026 00:00
"Television is more interesting than people. If it were not, we would have people standing in the corners of our rooms."
Dwight D. Eisenhower
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Dwight_D._Eisenhower
Published: January 2, 2026 00:00
"A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done."
Joe Martin
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Joe_Martin
Published: January 1, 2026 00:00
"The most overlooked advantage to owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against wacking them around a little."
Oscar Wilde
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Oscar_Wilde
Published: January 1, 2026 00:00
"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it."
George Gallup
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/George_Gallup
Published: January 1, 2026 00:00
"I could prove God statistically."
G. K. Chesterton
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/G._K._Chesterton
Published: January 1, 2026 00:00
"If there were no God, there would be no Atheists."
Samuel Goldwyn
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Samuel_Goldwyn
Published: December 31, 2025 00:00
"If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive."
P. B. Medawar
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/P._B._Medawar
Published: December 31, 2025 00:00
"The human mind treats a new idea the same way the body treats a strange protein; it rejects it."
George C. Marshall
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/George_C._Marshall
Published: December 31, 2025 00:00
"If man does find the solution for world peace it will be the most revolutionary reversal of his record we have ever known."
Edith Sitwell
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Edith_Sitwell
Published: December 31, 2025 00:00
"I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it."
Harry S Truman
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Harry_S_Truman
Published: December 30, 2025 00:00
"All the President is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing and kicking people to get them to do what they are supposed to do anyway."
Scott Adams
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Scott_Adams
Published: December 30, 2025 00:00
"The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers."
Malcolm Forbes
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Malcolm_Forbes
Published: December 30, 2025 00:00
"There is never enough time, unless you're serving it."
Laurence J. Peter
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Laurence_J._Peter
Published: December 30, 2025 00:00
"Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it."
Paul Valery
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Paul_Valery
Published: December 29, 2025 00:00
"Books have the same enemies as people: fire, humidity, animals, weather, and their own content."
Mark Twain
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Mark_Twain
Published: December 29, 2025 00:00
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
Margaret Mitchell
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Margaret_Mitchell
Published: December 29, 2025 00:00
"Until you've lost your reputation, you never realize what a burden it was."
Bethania McKenstry
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Bethania_McKenstry
Published: December 29, 2025 00:00
"I'm not sure I want popular opinion on my side -- I've noticed those with the most opinions often have the fewest facts."