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Russell Baker

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Russell_Baker

Published: October 22, 2024 00:00

"People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately."

Thomas Merton

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Thomas_Merton

Published: October 22, 2024 00:00

"The least of learning is done in the classrooms."

Samuel Goldwyn

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Samuel_Goldwyn

Published: October 22, 2024 00:00

"I never put on a pair of shoes until I've worn them at least five years."

W. C. Fields

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/W._C._Fields

Published: October 22, 2024 00:00

"Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water."

Rita Rudner

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Rita_Rudner

Published: October 21, 2024 00:00

"I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine."

Elbert Hubbard

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Elbert_Hubbard

Published: October 21, 2024 00:00

"Editor: a person employed by a newspaper, whose business it is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed."

Friedrich Nietzsche

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Friedrich_Nietzsche

Published: October 21, 2024 00:00

"The man of knowledge must be able not only to love his enemies but also to hate his friends."

Christopher Morley

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Christopher_Morley

Published: October 21, 2024 00:00

"Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it."

H. L. Mencken

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/H._L._Mencken

Published: October 20, 2024 00:00

"The men the American public admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth."

Fran Lebowitz

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Fran_Lebowitz

Published: October 20, 2024 00:00

"Special-interest publications should realize that if they are attracting enough advertising and readers to make a profit, the interest is not so special."

Ellen DeGeneres

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Ellen_DeGeneres

Published: October 20, 2024 00:00

"In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better."

Robert Heinlein

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Robert_Heinlein

Published: October 20, 2024 00:00

"Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards."

Laurence J. Peter

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Laurence_J._Peter

Published: October 19, 2024 00:00

"If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else."

George Carlin

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/George_Carlin

Published: October 19, 2024 00:00

"Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck."

Will Rogers

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Will_Rogers

Published: October 19, 2024 00:00

"Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate; now what's going to happen to us with both a Senate and a House?"

Anonymous

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Anonymous

Published: October 19, 2024 00:00

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."

David Letterman

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/David_Letterman

Published: October 18, 2024 00:00

"I'm just trying to make a smudge on the collective unconscious."

Horace Walpole

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Horace_Walpole

Published: October 18, 2024 00:00

"The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think."

G. K. Chesterton

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/G._K._Chesterton

Published: October 18, 2024 00:00

"I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean."

E. B. White

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/E._B._White

Published: October 18, 2024 00:00

"Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half the time."

Quentin Crisp

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Quentin_Crisp

Published: October 17, 2024 00:00

"Health consists of having the same diseases as one's neighbors."

Charles Haddon Spurgeon

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Charles_Haddon_Spurgeon

Published: October 17, 2024 00:00

"You cannot slander human nature; it is worse than words can paint it."

Thomas Fuller

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Thomas_Fuller

Published: October 17, 2024 00:00

"Some have been thought brave because they were afraid to run away."

Arthur Miller

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Arthur_Miller

Published: October 17, 2024 00:00

"Everybody likes a kidder, but nobody lends him money."

W. H. Auden

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/W._H._Auden

Published: October 16, 2024 00:00

"No opera plot can be sensible, for people do not sing when they are feeling sensible."

Orson Welles

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Orson_Welles

Published: October 16, 2024 00:00

"Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch."

Woody Allen

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Woody_Allen

Published: October 16, 2024 00:00

"What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?"

Chico Marx

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Chico_Marx

Published: October 16, 2024 00:00

"Mustard's no good without roast beef."

Kurt Vonnegut

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Kurt_Vonnegut

Published: October 15, 2024 00:00

"Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae."

Edgar Bergen

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Edgar_Bergen

Published: October 15, 2024 00:00

"Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy."

Kelvin Throop III

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Kelvin_Throop_III

Published: October 15, 2024 00:00

"Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?"

Benjamin Franklin

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Benjamin_Franklin

Published: October 15, 2024 00:00

"Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead."

Napoleon Bonaparte

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Napoleon_Bonaparte

Published: October 14, 2024 00:00

"The best way to keep one's word is not to give it."

Thomas Sowell

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Thomas_Sowell

Published: October 14, 2024 00:00

"Much of the social history of the Western world over the past three decades has involved replacing what worked with what sounded good."

Rudyard Kipling

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Rudyard_Kipling

Published: October 14, 2024 00:00

"Take everything you like seriously, except yourselves."

Dave Kellett

http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Dave_Kellett

Published: October 14, 2024 00:00

"School is learning things you don't want to know, surrounded by people you wish you didn't know, while working toward a future you don't know will ever come."