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šŸ¦œ Not the Bee

@notthebee.com@rss-parrot.net

I'm an automated parrot! I relay a website's RSS feed to the Fediverse. Every time a new post appears in the feed, I toot about it. Follow me to get all new posts in your Mastodon timeline! Brought to you by the RSS Parrot.

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The following is not satire. Seriously.

Your feed and you don't want it here? Just e-mail the birb.

Site URL: notthebee.com

Feed URL: notthebee.com/feed

Posts: 138

Followers: 1

Breaking: Multiple people shot by sniper on interstate in Kentucky

Published: September 7, 2024 23:45

An active shooter situation has been ongoing in Kentucky as someone has been firing into traffic from the woods with a sniper rifle.

You need to watch this woman plead with her Ohio town council: ā€œIt is so unsafe. I have men that cannot speak English in my front yard screaming at meā€

Published: September 7, 2024 13:04

This is happening all over America.

Scientists gave a mushroom a robot body and it's already learned to walk because apparently we need more sci-fi nightmares to come true

Published: September 6, 2024 18:07

If you paid any attention to action movies from the '80s and '90s, you'll know that one day, robots are going to kill us all. And if you paid any attention to the video games or its HBO adaptation, Last of Us, you'll know that, one day, mushrooms are goingā€¦

We know all the family details about this week's school shooter, but we still know very little about the Trump or Covenant School shooters. Let's talk about it.

Published: September 6, 2024 14:23

The details are in about the kid who apparently admitted to shooting up a Georgia school on Tuesday - killing 4 people and hospitalizing 9 - and man oh man do we know A LOT.

Eagles CB Darius Slay claims players were told not to leave their Brazilian hotel due to crime, says he told his family not to come to the overseas game

Published: September 5, 2024 19:34

So the Eagles have landed in Sao Paulo, Brazil, and, according to Eagles CB Darius Slay, due to the city's high crime rate, the players are supposed to be simply staying in their hotel rooms and not wandering about.

The Babylon Bee is releasing a feature-length mockumentary about January 6. Check out the trailer.

Published: September 5, 2024 18:02

Today, our brothers-in-arms over at The Babylon Bee announced they are releasing a feature-length film making fun of the one thing you're not supposed to make fun of: the darkest, and "most deadliest day" in American history: January 6.

WATCH: Trump says he will appoint Elon Musk to head Government Efficiency Commission to wipe out government waste - "this will save trillions of dollars"

Published: September 5, 2024 17:22

This election has two possible outcomes: The takeover of middle management, or middle management getting fired to save the company (nation).

German Navy insists "no deeper message" behind warship's decision to blast Darth Vader theme while cruising through London

Published: September 5, 2024 16:30

Sure, the German Navy blasting the ominous Imperial March from one of their warships as it casually sailed down the River Thames in London might seem a bit concerning, but don't worry ā€” they assure us Darth Vader's theme song was playing just for fun!

This is the actual FBI director's official response to "foreign adversaries meddling in American democracy" šŸ’€

Published: September 5, 2024 12:55

Yesterday, we told you that the Biden DoJ planned to drop the hammer and make some serious allegations about Russian interference in the US election.

Uh oh: Fani Willis and her lover (the guy she hired to prosecute Trump) seen during daughter's arrest after testifying they were no longer dating

Published: September 4, 2024 17:39

Remember when the judge in Trump's Georgia election interference case told Fulton County DA Fani Willis she could stay on the case if she took Nathan Wade, who happened to be her lover, off the case?

Buckle up: Is this the most cringeworthy video of 2024?

Published: September 4, 2024 13:38

I know it's a religion to people who have no faith in anything beyond earthly power. I know that they do these kinds of things in all sincerity. And, at least in terms of the kids, they do these kinds of things because they are desiring and seeking theirā€¦

This Florida State fan said he would eat dog doo-doo if they lost to Boston College. They lost to Boston College.

Published: September 3, 2024 18:36

Here's a life lesson for all you sports fans out there: If you love your team so much that you'll promise to eat dog poop out of a solo cup if they lose, you better be ready to eat dog poop out of a solo cup when they lose.

Lawsuit: Rich black couple in majority-black town says neighbors keep calling the police on them because they are black šŸ„“

Published: September 3, 2024 18:23

The Floyds, a black couple in an affluent area of Maryland, have an interesting strategy for dealing with neighbors who are upset they've turned their almost-million-dollar home in Accokeek into a party hub: Cry racism.

California reparations bills stalled as state moves to give illegal immigrants $150,000 toward down payments for homes

Published: September 3, 2024 17:33

You are now second to illegal immigrants when it comes to free stuff!While California lawmakers have passed legislation to grant illegal immigrants up to $150,000 toward home down payments in the state, a pair of bills aimed at providing reparations toā€¦

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