@buttondown.email.monteiro@rss-parrot.net
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**Hi.** My name is Mike and this is my newsletter. Every week I answer one of your questions. The question can be about anything you want, but I'll only answer it if I think I can give a good answer. To ask a question, just subscribe and reply to one of the newsletters. **Why the hell should I subscribe to this?** Well, you shouldn’t. You should go outside and plant a garden. You should start a band! You should go explore every part of the world you’ve ever wanted to see. You should learn Italian, French, or Tagalog. You should volunteer your time to an organization that works with disadvantaged youth. You should go teach an ESL class for immigrants at the local community college. You should spend your time tracking down abusive priests, like some sacred Avenger. Those are the things you should do. And I encourage you to do them. Feel free to subscribe to my newsletter because you want to. In addition to doing some of those things above. **How often will this shit hit my inbox?** Weekly. **Are you going to eventually charge us for this newsletter?** Nope. I can’t imagine asking you to pay for this. I might promote some stuff at the bottom of the newsletter. Don’t get me wrong, I very much want your money. But not for a newsletter. **Who did that drawing in your newsletter header, and is it supposed to be you?** My friend, the wonderful Kate Bingaman-Burt. And yes. **Is there any hope for the world?** No, but there's a lot of work to do.
Site URL: buttondown.email/monteiro
Feed URL: buttondown.email/monteiro/rss
Posts: 10
Followers: 1
How to get out of bed
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-get-out-of-bed/
Published: June 12, 2026 00:36
Making slow but sure progress on this very large painting. Enjoying the newsletter? $2/mo is one way to show your love. This week’s question comes to us anonymously: Mike, how do I get out of bed every day? How do I try? Last night, like a lot of people, I…
Interrupting cow says wha…
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/interrupting-cow-says-wha/
Published: June 10, 2026 18:15
Hello loves, Sorry to interrupt everyone in the middle of the week (I’m not), but if this showed up in your inbox it’s because I really, really, really like you. And I want you to come to tomorrow’s book event. I’ll be talking to the amazing Sacha Judd…
How to use NO as a complete sentence
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-use-no-as-a-complete-sentence/
Published: June 5, 2026 18:00
Happy Pride. I found this sticker on a rack when I was chaining up my bike. If you enjoy this newsletter please consider giving me $2/mo to help keep it going. This week’s question comes to us anonymously: I did my job fine before AI came along. Now my…
How to remember and forget
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-remember-and-forget/
Published: May 30, 2026 12:00
This massive thing is currently in progress. 🍳 Enjoying the newsletter? Join the $2 Lunch Club! 🥓 This week’s question comes to us from Jim Christensen: Do you have any tricks for forgetting? I wish there were as many for forgetting as there are for…
How to be a carnival barker
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-be-a-carnival-barker/
Published: May 22, 2026 00:18
My tween neighbor kept a list of my cussing at my book reading and presented it to me on her way out. 😍 Enjoying this newsletter? Join the $2 Lunch Club! This week’s question comes to us from Ani King: My first book is coming out this year and I have a…
How to deal with your kid leaving
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-deal-with-your-kid-leaving/
Published: May 14, 2026 23:33
A really fucked up Daffy Duck I painted yesterday This week’s question comes to us anonymously: My child is in high school and I’ve been in deep mourning for the last two years that they’ll (likely) be leaving me first for college, and then for...life!…
How to pick a movie
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-pick-a-movie/
Published: May 8, 2026 22:45
Female Trouble, John Waters, 1974 THIS MONDAY! May 11. Join me and Annalee Newitz at The Booksmith where we discuss my new book, How to Die (& other stories). Free! This week’s question comes to us from Ben Bartosik: What are your top ten favorite movies?…
How to smoke
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-smoke/
Published: May 1, 2026 20:10
The best part of smoking was always the click of the Zippo. This week’s question comes to us from Mat Honan: I used to love to smoke. If it weren’t for the whole lung cancer, emphysema, death thing, would you recommend smoking? You’re forgetting the smell.…
How to read
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-read/
Published: April 24, 2026 19:21
Join me and Annalee Newitz on May 11 at Booksmith! RSVP, please. This week’s question comes to us from Jonathan Stephens: I want to write like you when I grow up. What potential paths would you recommend to travel towards? Whatever path gets you to the…
How to eat pizza
https://buttondown.com/monteiro/archive/how-to-eat-pizza/
Published: April 17, 2026 23:47
I did a photo shoot with the new book and things quickly went south. This week’s question comes to us from Michael Walsh: Can I eat the last slice of pizza in the box? This is the wrong question to be asking. The better question is “Am I hungry?” An even…