RSS Parrot

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msji7berdc2u

Published: August 7, 2026 21:18

[real bad mood voice] i sure hope this garbage bag doesn’t rip on the way out to the garb oh well would you look at that

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msjbicleks22

Published: August 7, 2026 19:17

i briefly sit down cross-cross applesauce until several of my lower body joints and bones shatter mightily. there is a clanking noise and steam exits my body from an unknown location

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msiprqf67c2z

Published: August 7, 2026 14:01

good feeling fun time post

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msikdafu2s2s

Published: August 7, 2026 12:23

someone at Hellman's corporate is taking credit for this on their year end review and campaigning for an "Exceptional" rating [contains quote post or other embedded content]

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msik2svrec2s

Published: August 7, 2026 12:18

even if i'm way ahead of my laundry- everything's washed, dried, and neatly folded- i still like to set some clothes aside to put away a few days later, to keep myself real

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msh3yzcwks2q

Published: August 6, 2026 22:34

thinking back to that scene in Over The Top where the guy drinks motor oil and narrowing eyes at myself because i can’t remember if i’ve tried it or not

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msgkhige3c2f

Published: August 6, 2026 17:20

sneaking into your home and placing a twenty dollar bill in your fall coat pocket

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msg77pshbk2l

Published: August 6, 2026 13:59

my dog after i lovingly moisturize her nose and paws

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msdn5536ws2k

Published: August 5, 2026 13:30

[murderer while in the middle of murdering me] did you just call timeout

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msdlxi3jr226

Published: August 5, 2026 13:09

thinking back on one of my most formative summers where we got a ouija board at the toy store and then everything in the world was extremely haunted until we went back to school

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msbcuptuic2x

Published: August 4, 2026 15:21

oh did you say “nelly’s country grammar”? my bad i thought you said “fraser’s kelsey grammer”. either way, they’re both special order but i can have them here as quick as wednesday

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msb55bxmps2s

Published: August 4, 2026 13:38

my wife and i share a single login for the local grocery store rewards program and one huge benefit of this is that it has helped me memorize her phone number

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3msarixwi2s23

Published: August 4, 2026 10:10

may august the fourth be with you

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3ms7fah3ipk2o

Published: August 3, 2026 20:58

day not going great, just got put on a paper towel limit for the whole rest of the week

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3ms6ywvgncc2r

Published: August 3, 2026 17:18

[public enemy hype voice] bring the cheese

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrzgpta55c2r

Published: August 1, 2026 12:08

so the reflecting pool wasn’t vandalized?? well then hang on a sec because what the heck else has this guy not been honest about with us?? ??

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrzfqot3u225

Published: August 1, 2026 11:51

middle agers of the corn

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrzfomsvz225

Published: August 1, 2026 11:50

i am once again pursuing false hope by consuming a delicious caffeinated beverage

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrxee6gqck2s

Published: July 31, 2026 16:21

my dentist made the local news last night because he tried to run the ice cream man off the road again

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrxcok7o5k2j

Published: July 31, 2026 15:51

first date was going really well until, for some unknown reason, i said “correctamundo” out of freaking nowhere

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrx4sxvacs2h

Published: July 31, 2026 14:06

calendar said today would be Friday so i just double checked out in the real world and, wouldn’t you know it, that son of a bitch nailed it again

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrwxjmpf5k2h

Published: July 31, 2026 12:31

whistling pleasantly as we enjoy a cool, early summer morning walk, a near full moon visible in the sky. the neighborhood is peaceful: it’s still pre-dawn but sprinklers are running, birds are singing and all seems right in the world my dog: FATHER THERE…

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrwnzcrdqc2b

Published: July 31, 2026 09:41

it is the worst when you get out a pair of pants to try on but they aren’t the look today. and now i have to put those pants back? i’m going to be busy getting another pair of pants because these didn’t work. maybe these pants can cool off on the bedroom…

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrvlvk7cps2c

Published: July 30, 2026 23:31

my dad used to be able to fit a whole carton of ice cream into one scoop

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrviz3droc2f

Published: July 30, 2026 22:39

whenever an ad pops up on the show i’m watching, i look at my phone immediately so as not to be corrupted

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrudpqbadk2l

Published: July 30, 2026 11:31

Chemo Day #104 Coool sweatshirt Air Jordan 3 True Blue

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrszjcme2s2i

Published: July 29, 2026 22:56

could really use a deviled egg based holiday right now

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrskyvj7g225

Published: July 29, 2026 18:37

them: (wise) what goes around comes around me: (also wise) ah yes, the mysterious boomerang

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrrths3qrk2h

Published: July 29, 2026 11:35

i've run the numbers three times now and it's always the same

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrqeobuxvk2g

Published: July 28, 2026 21:38

hey nice item you’ve got there- let me guess, mystical??

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrqbxmjlv227

Published: July 28, 2026 20:49

have you ever had one of those days where you just go aaaggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhgggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *recharge*…

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrl6qml24c23

Published: July 26, 2026 20:09

[alternate universe] hi my name's Denny Davito nice to meet you

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrijwphbps2s

Published: July 25, 2026 18:51

calling on the once respectable and charming Richie Rich to publicly denounce his now caustic lifestyle

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrifqz4tuc2b

Published: July 25, 2026 17:36

hey we’re heading out to the county fair later if you want to smell a bunch of manure and get your shoes real dirty, lmk

https://bsky.app/profile/ygrene.bsky.social/post/3mrht34sks22z

Published: July 25, 2026 12:02

new Saturday just dropped and they are saying it is absolutely PACKED with riboflavin