RSS Parrot

https://bsky.app/profile/unburntwitch.com/post/3mbrvf2j5wk2b

Published: January 6, 2026 21:27

Kimahri just sits like this sometimes

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Published: January 6, 2026 18:59

Boneless chicken wings are just gentrified chicken nuggets [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: January 6, 2026 08:37

A weasel pile has formed up against my leg

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Published: January 6, 2026 02:31

Ughhh just got voted out in an ORG because I didn’t realize I befriended a pick me girl who fully faked a friendship outside of the actual game just to betray me so she could “only play with guys”. Barf. Baaaarf. Baaaaaaaaaarf

https://bsky.app/profile/unburntwitch.com/post/3mbplevc56k2x

Published: January 5, 2026 23:22

Dropped out of pro wrestling school cause I didn’t know how to tuck my chin and got a concussion, so I enrolled in a tumbling class at a circus school thinking “that’s basically remedial falling”. Class one, instructor assisted handstand: on my first…

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Published: January 5, 2026 20:38

“The vengabus is coming” [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: January 5, 2026 07:36

why does my remote have a privacy policy I must agree to, I simply want to eat fruit and watch rich housewives fight

https://bsky.app/profile/unburntwitch.com/post/3mbnucsu5bc2l

Published: January 5, 2026 06:57

Pointing out the hypocrisy of psychos is a losing game BUT it still wows me sometimes how the doublespeak works across issues. So concerned with aborted tissue but willing to throw wanted children into school shootings and poverty. So angry at drugs in…

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Published: January 5, 2026 04:14

$1087. It was really close. [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: January 5, 2026 04:12

Update on the ORG betting challenge: I took the strategy of not placing any bets and keeping my $1000 starting fake dollars instead since there was no rule that you had to bet. I came in second place.

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Published: January 4, 2026 20:42

A timeline blessing

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Published: January 4, 2026 19:50

how it feels cuddling with someone twice your size (complimentary)

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Published: January 3, 2026 20:19

it’s a log off an organize kind of day isn’t it

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Published: January 3, 2026 18:02

what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

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Published: January 3, 2026 02:08

hhhhhhh so I'm in an ORG and have an individual challenge involving sports betting on real games (with fake money)... anyone got any hot tips? I don't gamble because it feels like setting money on fire with more steps so I'm a sitting duck here

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Published: January 2, 2026 21:09

Debuff: It is raining in Los Angeles. Effect: Donut Size -30%

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Published: January 2, 2026 18:41

Local Furby says “Whoa! Big sound, wah!” Join me, Reuters, an alleged news organization, as I inexplicably treat it as a source. [contains quote post or other embedded content]

https://bsky.app/profile/unburntwitch.com/post/3mbhii27z2k2q

Published: January 2, 2026 18:09

look man I don’t have the time to argue with people over if they should be on twitter at all, I left a 130k account behind as soon as Elon took the reins, but if you’re paying money to Herr Corpselips to use his social media, I kinda look at your little…

https://bsky.app/profile/unburntwitch.com/post/3mbgfsi3ixs2i

Published: January 2, 2026 07:48

Help

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Published: January 2, 2026 06:51

having a rhetorical statement on my dating profile and the replies it generates are doing a fantastic job of letting me know who is annoying as fuck to talk to and probably insufferable on social media too

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Published: January 2, 2026 02:47

Easy. [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: January 1, 2026 21:29

Aloof wife / mayor boyfriend [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: January 1, 2026 20:18

I only really have one New Year’s resolution this year (mainly to avoid adhd traps of trying to sign up for too many things and immediately burning out), but it’s that I’d like to go do death doula training.

https://bsky.app/profile/unburntwitch.com/post/3mbewj5caqk2c

Published: January 1, 2026 17:42

Just fyi this is one of the many reasons Californians don’t like Newsom. A 5% tax on our 200 billionaires would prevent a healthcare collapse from the ACA subsidies going away and he’s opposed to it.

https://bsky.app/profile/unburntwitch.com/post/3mbeuvh436s2c

Published: January 1, 2026 17:13

wakka gets so mad when the rice is moved

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Published: January 1, 2026 06:21

quick, show me the dumbest picture you took in 2025

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Published: January 1, 2026 03:27

Uhhhhh maybe I’ll sit this one out [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: January 1, 2026 03:17

happy excuse to drink some martinelli’s day fuck I love that sparkling apple juice

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Published: January 1, 2026 02:24

Over 80% of the wealth on earth is concentrated at the Eden rock hotel in st Bartholomew as billionaires and their pet celebrities congregate for a superyacht NYE festival. It’s not far off from Epstein island either. Etsy witches i call upon thee to do…

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Published: January 1, 2026 00:36

Not to mention it looks so friggin good [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: January 1, 2026 00:24

2025 accomplishments: - made a GOTY - got laid off - made this

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Published: December 31, 2025 23:23

oh this? [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: December 31, 2025 23:03

She wants what’s bad for her, she’s just like me fr

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Published: December 31, 2025 22:41

and fucking stay out [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: December 31, 2025 21:32

think I’ll ring in 2026 by making a sword. maybe it’ll become a good omen or something.

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Published: December 31, 2025 20:29

Definitely the one that ended up in print after I think I made a lady question her sexuality or something. This was in NY magazine. [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: December 31, 2025 15:24

Horses are born with tentacles that fall off when they’re babies. It’s so they don’t kick their way through their moms when they’re still baking in the horse oven.That’s the origin of the term “horse feathers”. (Horses kinda freak me out so I know all…

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Published: December 31, 2025 01:28

Oh no I’ve raised a Gamer

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Published: December 30, 2025 22:30

I mean if they’re gonna paywall the fuck out of everything and force constant ads into stuff you pay for… [contains quote post or other embedded content]

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Published: December 30, 2025 21:21

my “hear me out” is the cunty little Casio keyboard sounding handclaps in The Man with the Machine Gun and I’ll not be explaining myself further

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Published: December 30, 2025 00:44

A million years ago on a subway in Toronto once, I saw a guy holding an air conditioner and turned to my friend and whispered “look at Michael Cera with his sad little air conditioner”. The guy looked up having heard me anyway and gave me a dirty look.…

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Published: December 29, 2025 21:20

thinkin about third sanctuary again

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Published: December 29, 2025 21:10

the ferrets got a new tube for Christmas. I love my stinky catsnakes

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Published: December 29, 2025 20:47

Sometimes brother is hat

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Published: December 29, 2025 20:18

woke up next to this