https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mupzwtiw322j
Published: September 4, 2026 22:41
Behold, the Triumphal Arch of Extravagant Failure!
@bsky.app.profile.rexhuppke.bsky.social@rss-parrot.net
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(VERY SERIOUS) USA TODAY humor(ish) columnist. May or may not be notable. Hypocrisy enthusiast. WOKE MOB, CO-FOUNDER. ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE (2017 to present).
Site URL: bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social
Feed URL: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:tufhwskzvgoz7gih4ufahp3n/rss
Posts: 61
Followers: 1
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mupzwtiw322j
Published: September 4, 2026 22:41
Behold, the Triumphal Arch of Extravagant Failure!
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mupzkcbyek2j
Published: September 4, 2026 22:34
In the event I'm ever fired, I expect @joshmankiewicz.bsky.social to back me up when I deny that I was fired. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mupyv3um6c2m
Published: September 4, 2026 22:23
I strongly encourage people who like words on pages to check out @dj-acid-reflux.bsky.social, a funny, creative and wildly engaging wordsmith of the highest order: [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mupqlug3tc2s
Published: September 4, 2026 19:54
Yessssss. Keep talking, sir. This is the message your party needs for the midterms. Keep talking. Mwahhh-hah-hah-hah-hahhhhhh!! [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muppnjdyqc2n
Published: September 4, 2026 19:37
Proud to be #1,061! Thanks to all my fan. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mupicvw3hc2g
Published: September 4, 2026 17:26
This is truly dispiriting. The Chicago Park District, which owns Soldier Field, should have never let this happen. But the fact that this many people can look past everything West has said and done is tragic. [contains quote post or other embeddedā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3munyghnc3s2d
Published: September 4, 2026 03:09
1/ I have some election advice for Democrats: Just be decent human beings. Donāt be weird. Donāt be cute. Donāt deliver polished bullshit. Talk to people like theyāre people, which they are, and show them some ways youāll work to make their lives better.
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3munu6dosy22d
Published: September 4, 2026 01:53
What in the name of all that is holy is going on here?
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3munc3umrus2f
Published: September 3, 2026 20:29
I'm not sure quite what's going on here. I thought all these nutters hated pronouns.
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mun6ti7wlk2j
Published: September 3, 2026 19:31
Hmmmmm. Stay tuned.
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mun5ai6lnk2w
Published: September 3, 2026 19:02
The character-less bearded derp, when confronted in the wild, instinctively comes to the defense of other character-less bearded derps, a phenomenon that has mystified wildlife biologists for decades. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mun2gvgzks2l
Published: September 3, 2026 18:12
Of all the not-going-to-be-presidents, this man is the most not-going-to-be-president. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mumzalftnk2i
Published: September 3, 2026 17:51
I hope America can withstand the incoming cyclone of rizz. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mumxk7c3rc2i
Published: September 3, 2026 17:21
Oh no, now Fox News producers will have to find another person to lie on TV with almost pathological vigor. How ever will they manage? [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mumw4o2dx22d
Published: September 3, 2026 16:55
The Pentagon took down its plan for testosterone testing the day after it posted the plan. Seems Pete Hegseth is struggling to...keep his plan up. š [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mulj26w2t223
Published: September 3, 2026 03:28
Nobody other than our 80-year-old loon president calls it the āHormuz Strait.ā Itās the Strait of Hormuz, so the proper wordplay would be āthe Strait of Trump,ā not the āTrump Strait,ā and I canāt believe Iām even quibbling over something this unbearablyā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mula5wgstc2m
Published: September 3, 2026 00:49
Mark my words: They're doing this because they're getting ready to bulldoze the place. It's not like there have been any consequences from tearing down the East Wing. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mukzhj3kg22f
Published: September 2, 2026 22:50
18 dead, hundreds wounded...and Trump makes jokes. He and his lackeys ignore the lives that hang in the balance, ignore the will of the American people and brush off the economic pain this war is causing with childish jokes and brazen deception. Be madā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mukygh355c2t
Published: September 2, 2026 22:31
This top Rahm Emanuel disliker reveals he's leaning toward laughing really hard at this. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mukr57s3rk26
Published: September 2, 2026 20:21
The āTrump Straitā? The president is joking around while American soldiers are getting wounded and killed. An absolute disgrace. My column: https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/columnist/2026/09/02/iran-trump-strait-hormuz-us-deaths/91582244007/
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mukmxaiekk2d
Published: September 2, 2026 19:06
So Tom Cox (@dj-acid-reflux.bsky.social) is a brilliant writer and a pal I got to know a bit at the old, horrible place previously known as Twitter. Lost touch a bit in the transition, but I've found him and I've now delightedly ordered his new book ofā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muj3gxv6722u
Published: September 2, 2026 04:20
āFuriousā on Hulu is one of the best shows Iāve seen this year. Just brilliant. Gut-wrenching. Outstanding performances.
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muhz4goanc2b
Published: September 1, 2026 18:05
When the Supreme Court ruling came down, I immediately ran out the front door, past the car I can no longer afford to put gas in, and shouted to my neighbors: āTHE BALLROOM WILL BE BUILT!ā Nobody came out to celebrate, likely because their children haveā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muhwibas5c2z
Published: September 1, 2026 17:18
I was working on putting our youngest child up for adoption and draining my retirement account so we could afford potentially tainted beef when I learned the joyous news: AMERICA IS GETTING ITS BALLROOM! My column celebrating the Supreme Court's awesomeā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muhtr3kjpc2c
Published: September 1, 2026 16:30
Current Chicago weather forecast: 100% chance of steam.
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muhrsefohk2t
Published: September 1, 2026 15:54
Love this for the GOP as a campaign slogan for the midterms. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mugclrk3ds2t
Published: September 1, 2026 01:50
I dunno, I just think āthe president canāt seem to stay awake for more than 10 minutesā should be a bigger story.
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mufy24m2j226
Published: August 31, 2026 22:41
TRUMP'S VIEW OF AMERICA: A farmer in the rural Midwest sits on the porch, looking out on the land that has been in his family for generations, the land he just had to sell to keep from declaring bankruptcy. He glances at his phone. "Yes!" he exclaims.ā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mufrqjptf22n
Published: August 31, 2026 20:48
This is honestly a gift from the Supreme Court to Democrats heading into the midterms. Ballroom for them, high gas prices for you. The ads write themselves. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mufo5c6ig22o
Published: August 31, 2026 19:44
Look at freakin' Temu John Wayne over here. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muflzzckgc2x
Published: August 31, 2026 19:06
This is a good list by @michaelianblack.bsky.social, and it's definitely not complete, and it's kind of bonkers how many dumbass things are on this list. Like when you put all this stuff together in one place, it's wild. [contains quote post or otherā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mufjoy3by22i
Published: August 31, 2026 18:24
I MEAN, PICK A SIDE, BUTTON! ARE YOU "STOP" OR ARE YOU "START"? HOW ARE REAL AMERICANS SUPPOSED TO MAKE SENSE OF THIS?!?! [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mufi7cwmxc2s
Published: August 31, 2026 17:57
Trump's AI slop is fake. His horrible poll numbers are not. The man who brags about everything but does nothing now has nothing to brag about, leaving Republicans with zilch to run on but lies, fear-mongering and pictures of the new White House grout. Myā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mufczroszk2l
Published: August 31, 2026 16:25
In light of Trump's pro-data-center post, I am re-upping yesterday's extremely smart and serious column: https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/columnist/2026/08/30/ai-data-center-epa-pollution-trump/91489797007/
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mudtgjbcws26
Published: August 31, 2026 02:13
Quite literally everything going on in this video, from the faces to the hair to the skin to the voices to the words being spoken, makes me incredibly uncomfortable. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mudh7jvyxk24
Published: August 30, 2026 22:34
When I learned a data center was being built near me, I stood up on my human chair and cheered. āAt last,ā I shouted, gleefully, āI will have data nearby. In a center. Which is definitely a good thing!ā I love data. And I love centers. What could beā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mucs4vhgtk2c
Published: August 30, 2026 16:17
I think data centers are great and we should fully embrace them. My reasoned column: https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/columnist/2026/08/30/ai-data-center-epa-pollution-trump/91489797007/
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3muayxcp6xc2l
Published: August 29, 2026 23:14
I suspect Pritzker will run for president, and I suspect people will like him a lot. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu6gvjhibk2k
Published: August 28, 2026 22:45
This would be the Ron DeSantis of Jeb Bush presidential campaigns. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu6f5g4vdc2k
Published: August 28, 2026 22:14
My top issues when voting are: 1) Bring Maggot Hagerman to justice 2) Ballroom 3) Own libs 4) Prosecute Comey ⦠27) Grocery prices ⦠57) Gas prices [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu65fybx7k2q
Published: August 28, 2026 19:56
Searching Instacart for "any food that hasn't been recalled."
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu5vracf4c2d
Published: August 28, 2026 17:39
Part of me wonders if Donald Trump ate Mitch McConnell. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu5u4tpxn22j
Published: August 28, 2026 17:09
Immensely proud of these folks at NASA. He's using them as a prop for his bullshit and they are in no way accommodating it. He'll likely respond to this by defunding NASA, calling them "not nice people." [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu3xxenmoc2s
Published: August 27, 2026 23:13
Smart š§µ by @editorialboard.bsky.social: [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu3ut2j34s2o
Published: August 27, 2026 22:17
Tragically, Iāve watched and listened to and written about Trump for more than a decade. Heās not a complicated person. His id-driven responses are as predictable as the tides. And he will turn on the GOP before the midterms. Just watch. ā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu3o6e6w6k2g
Published: August 27, 2026 20:18
Every picture of Trump these days look like an AI-generated image that put something in the wrong place. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu3khoeli22o
Published: August 27, 2026 19:11
Well, I certainly feel safer. I'm going to sit back and enjoy a $10 box of cereal before going to the toilet-paper-less bathroom and seeing how my Trumpcoin crypto account is doing. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu3iednb3s2m
Published: August 27, 2026 18:34
With this post, I am hereby RENAMING my right arm "America Arm" and my finely sculpted man-calves "The Steel Calves of America."
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu3g3kep6c2q
Published: August 27, 2026 17:53
So it begins. Donald Trump has started laying the groundwork to blame Republicans if they suffer a midterm-election wipeout. This was as predictable as the tides. Trump cannot fail; he can only be failed. My column: ā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu3fmh6n222z
Published: August 27, 2026 17:44
šØBREAKING: GULF OF AMERICA SUES LAKE AMERICA FOR COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mu34wjkyik2z
Published: August 27, 2026 15:09
My latest video column, on Trump's stupid trade war with Canada. (Apologies for the handsomeness.) https://www.usatoday.com/videos/opinion/columnist/2026/08/27/trump-canada-tariffs-trade-war-republican-midterms/91482315007/
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtznmzpmrc23
Published: August 27, 2026 01:03
1/ Look, I'm no political strategist, but I do have my face constantly stuck in the firehose of news and I'm definitely better informed than most people, since that's my job. All that said, I know virtually nothing about Hasan Piker and have never heard orā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtzb5vnabk2j
Published: August 26, 2026 21:19
What in the actual hell is wrong with these miserable weirdos? This started cruel and stupid and devolved into evil and āIs it time to have dad institutionalized?ā [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtyxnlu7yk26
Published: August 26, 2026 18:29
This @cheekface.bsky.social song is such a banger, and these lyrics are part of why I love them: "I, I boycotted everything Nothing got better, it only got worse And now I don't know where to buy soap." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysAJeDY9MhU
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtyqyygj2k2f
Published: August 26, 2026 16:30
Brilliant gambit, sir. Let's see how it works out. [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtyqbr6aes2f
Published: August 26, 2026 16:17
ššÆ [contains quote post or other embedded content]
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtwujujc5c2v
Published: August 25, 2026 22:28
Borrowing from the playbook of master negotiators, Donald Trump has gained the upper hand in his ongoing trade war with Canada by ⦠wait for it ⦠threatening to rename a lake. I clap for our brilliant dealmaking president! And offer a few more things toā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtwhmdr4ds2a
Published: August 25, 2026 18:37
Dolly Parton preached kindness and acceptance. She worked hard to make people's lives better. She used her fame and status to help others. Now look at how her life is being celebrated. Look at the boundless love. This is the way. More people shouldā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtwfwocsdc2s
Published: August 25, 2026 18:07
The world just got a whole lot less good. Fare thee well, Dolly Parton. And thank you.
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtwet737vs2q
Published: August 25, 2026 17:47
Trump threatens to rename Lake Ontario. Checkmate, Canada. Good luck winning this trade war against President Deals McDealington. BOOM! My column: ā¦
https://bsky.app/profile/rexhuppke.bsky.social/post/3mtwcgs7spc25
Published: August 25, 2026 17:04
How have we not yet invented a better way to get the sesame seeds to stay on a sesame seed bagel? So much for American exceptionalism.