RSS Parrot

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mk2jeltvos2d

Published: April 22, 2026 03:07

i tried to watch a hockey game tonight but had to turn it off pretty quickly. within one minute flat they'd already broken basically every rule of basketball

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mk2aivh2ic2d

Published: April 22, 2026 00:28

i'd say my dog is smarter than about 15% of billionaires. i know it'd probably be funnier if i said all of them, or 50% of them, or something like that, but i think 15% is realistically closer

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjzl3ysiv22o

Published: April 21, 2026 18:05

i'm starting a side business as a tour guide for new york's worst sodas. i know which corner stores have the dustiest and most expired sodas, but my real ace in the hole is the one with a really loud fridge that doesn't work and stores room-temperature…

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjxy6gux4223

Published: April 21, 2026 02:54

given that donations opened this morning we could actually get to $500k by midnight www.edsbscharitybowl.com

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjxin37lkc2e

Published: April 20, 2026 22:16

i don’t get this post. is it supposed to be funny

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjx4mxlpgk2g

Published: April 20, 2026 18:41

i'm happy to see the onion take over infowars. i've been a big fan of the onion for quite a long time and it's given me plenty of laughs over the years. and as for infowars, i really disliked alex jones and disagreed with him on a whole lot of things. so…

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjx337r4bk2a

Published: April 20, 2026 18:13

i just went to his site and saw this shirt he's selling. who is the info war, well guess what it's you [contains quote post or other embedded content]

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjsqrnoxv225

Published: April 19, 2026 00:58

i'm deleting this post. since posting it i watched some more basketball and it turns out this is pretty much always what happens

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjrzytv7ks2x

Published: April 18, 2026 18:11

holy shit. i was just watching the cavs-raptors game and the ball fell out of the bottom of the basket. it was with 4:04 left in the second quarter if you can get your hands on a replay. the guy shot the ball, it went through the hoop, and then it straight…

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjruluk67c24

Published: April 18, 2026 16:34

i was gonna post something about star wars but my phone autocorrected it to “star ward” multiple times in a row and i thought it was funnier than the thing i was actually trying to post, so here you go: star ward

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjnvooe2pc2o

Published: April 17, 2026 02:43

i have limited programming experience but i bet i could stop a ddos attack. as soon as some weird traffic came in from somewhere i'd just shut it down. if they kept doing it i'd send them a virus email that put the words BACK OFF or BEWARE or something in…

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjnmnqffes2u

Published: April 17, 2026 00:01

you really have to look out for baseball players these days. they’re everywhere. a few minutes ago i turned on a baseball game and there were like 12 of those fuckin’ guys

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjl7vegdkk2q

Published: April 16, 2026 01:07

atheists get mad at me whenever i say this, but i 100% believe that dinosaurs really existed. their fossils have been found all over the world

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mjicolfook2v

Published: April 14, 2026 21:19

went to the store

https://bsky.app/profile/jonbois.bsky.social/post/3mji5wzidas2p

Published: April 14, 2026 19:55

toilet a at 1:30's fundamentals were a mess and it got exposed. not sure why anyone's surprised. you can't have footwork like that and expect to win in this league [contains quote post or other embedded content]